Today I am in New York for the wedding of my daughter. It's obviously a busy week and so I thought I'd use another Tale of the Piano Bar to cover for me. I should have known better. The teller of this
tale, Jody Duncan, and his partner, Nikos Hristodulakis, are proprietors of
Mykonos’ Montparnasse Piano Bar. His
story is in keeping with the bar’s reputation as the La Cage aux Folles of the
Aegean—which is about as subtle a way as I can think of to say that Jody’s
story (notice how I distance myself from the telling) will undoubtedly offend
some readers. Sorry about that, but from
my years as a lawyer involved in the personal travails of my clients, I can
assure you that similar sorts of events occur everyday, every where, though
rarely ending as peacefully as this did.
So, with for those with an open mind…here’s Jody.
It was just after sunset, the sea was silver and the sky blood orange. It was a few hours before our live
entertainment began but customers were gathered around the bar enjoying sunset,
including two gay men from Seattle, Arthur and David.
A conservative looking couple strolled in for a drink. A friendly sort, they introduced themselves
as husband Liam and wife Maureen from Ireland, on holiday with their two
teenage children. It was their first
time on Mykonos, they’d heard a lot about it, and were thrilled to finally be
here.
One drink led to another and soon Liam and Maureen were deeply engrossed in
conversation with David and Arthur.
Arthur was regaling Maureen with recommendations on places to explore and
things to do on Mykonos, while a few feet away husband Liam and David were engaged
in an animated exploration of a different sort.
Their hands were deep inside each other’s respective pants.
Nikos and I were in a panic, because if Maureen turned around, she couldn’t
miss what her husband and David were up to.
Arthur already knew, because he was facing Maureen and could see
everything going on behind her. He
pumped up his efforts to keep Maureen distracted and did a pretty good job of
it for far longer than I thought possible.
Just when it seemed Arthur could no longer keep Maureen’s attention away
from her husband—and Nikos and I were seriously considering launching a cold
water bath across the bar—they withdrew their hands.
Whew, the moment of
crisis had passed. But then David
suggested they all go to dinner together and Maureen agreed. As the British say, this shall end in tears. But
at least not in our place.
Or so we thought.
Around midnight Maureen returned to the bar, alone. She sat on a sofa across from the bar,
weeping. Nikos went over and asked her what
was wrong. As if he didn’t know.
She said she would like a Metaxa but didn’t have any money with her. Nikos
told her that wasn’t a problem and called for to me to bring her a snifter of
that Greek brandy. She said, “Thank you,”
and assured Nikos she’d pay as soon as she found her husband who had their
money. Nikos said not to worry and
innocently asked, “Where is your husband?”
After another round of tears, Maureen said, “He's run off with a man!”
Nikos feigned shock and assured her all would be better in the morning. He even made her smile when he said, “Darling,
at least he didn’t run off with a woman.”
He followed that up with, “This is Mykonos, and that sort of thing happens
here all the time." That wasn’t true,
but even if it were it’s not the sort of slogan the Mykonos Chamber of Commerce
would want bandied about to tourists. But
it made Maureen feel better to hear it, and that was all Nikos cared about at
the moment. She composed herself,
thanked us, and left.
By the following afternoon things seemed to have settled down between
Maureen and Liam. They showed up together
at the bar to settle Maureen’s tab and stayed for a round of drinks. Liam even thanked us for keeping Maureen calm
while he was “off doing his thing” the night before.
What husband Liam didn’t do was show a bit of remorse or offer an apology for
his behavior. We’ve no idea what
happened after the couple left our bar that day, but we seriously doubt we’ll ever
see them again on Mykonos—at least not with each other.
I’m sure there’s a moral to this beyond a cliché-like “all relationships
are complicated,” but frankly, I don’t know what it is.
How about, “Men are
all alike”?
***
From past experience,
many of us who make it through a Piano Bar Tale need a drink. So, with that in mind and as a public service
here’s the Montparnasse recipe for a doozy involving Metaxa…sans snifter and
tears.
Our Lavender Sidecar. To a cocktail shaker
filled with ice, add 1½ ounces Metaxa 5 star brandy, a healthy dash of tincture of
lavender, ¾ ounce of Triple Sec liqueur, and ½
ounce fresh lemon. Shake very well
and strain into a large old-fashioned glass rimmed with sugar and filled with
fresh ice. Add a twist of lemon peel to
garnish. Cheers!
Thanks, my friend, for picking this tale on the day of my daughter's wedding. I just hope everyone else out there cuts me some slack because I'll be getting more than enough grief from my daughter and her fourth-degree black belt husband-to-be for it appearing under my byline on this day:). Lots of love and congratulations, Karen & Terry.
Jeff—Saturday
