Friday, May 15, 2015

Lost in Translation

        I'm still not over it.
   My twenty year old Mp has trotted off to Parliament.She took her Dad with her to help her settle in.    I  hope her Dad will explain to her the fiscal  viability of exiting the EU.
   As they walked to Parliament, a camera picked up one of the Scottish Mp's saying 'So where are we   going?'
   To which the other replied, 'It's over by that big clock.....'






    So here is a humerous blog. I'm off to Crimefest....

                                 


        Danish Airline - We take your bags and send them in all directions


                                         

               Barbershop in Zannzibar, Tanzania – Gentlemen’s throats cut with nice sharp razors

              In the office of a doctor in Rome, Italy – Specialist in women and other diseases

             Tailor in Rhodes, Greece – Order your summers suit. Because is big rush, we will execute                    customers in strict rotation

            Cash machine in China – Help oneself terminating machine


                            


               Road signs in India – avoid overspeeding. Always avoid accidents

              Copenhagen – Take care of burglars

                                        

              Japanese washing machine – Push button, foam coming plenty, big noise, finish.

              In the window of an Indian shop – Why go somewhere else to be cheated when you can come              here?

           China – Haircuts half price today.  Only one per customer.

           Cairo – On September 30 winter timing will start as of 12.00 midnight all clocks will be forward        one hour back.

          Outside a tailor’s in Hong Kong – ladies may have a fit upstairs

           Shop in Mexico – Broken English spoken perfectly

          German to English textbook – after a certain time cheques are stale and cannot be cashed.

          Ankara – You are invited to visit our restaurant where you can eat middle eastern foods in a                 European ambulance

            Sign on a car in Manila – Car and owner for sale

             Bejing – no permission to wench

             Finland – if you cannot reach a fire exit, close the door and expose yourself at the window

              Greek deodorant stick – push up bottom

              China – please do not surpass the cautionary driftwood while having aquatic visiting

              Serbia – Let us know about an unefficiency as well as leaking on the service.  Our utmost will            improve it.
                                 


              Japan – children found straying will be taken to the lion house.

                                      
              Now he’s been to the doctor and is suffering from ... high blonde pressure

              American advert for Scandinavian vacuum cleaner – nothing sucks like an Electrolux

             East African newspaper – An new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors            have  thrown in the bulk of their workers
                                 


        Caro Ramsay (Bristol Bound) 15/05/2015

6 comments:

  1. I loved this! Plan to copy a lot of them! T. Straw in Manhattan

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  2. Caro, HI-LAR-I-OUS!!!!! On a Floretine menu:
    Italian: Funghi del bosco.
    English: Wooden mushrooms

    Have a great time. Hug Stan for me. Stan, hug Caro for me. All, hug Zoe for me. since I have never met Jorn face to face, I guess we better start with a handshake. ;)

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    Replies
    1. Dammit! I knew I should have made it to Bristol!

      When I was in Sapporo many years ago, the McDonald's take-out paper bags had "The food you must eat fast" written all over them.

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  3. So, Jeff, now that you back on Mykonos, do you use a stick deodorant? If so, how effective do you find it when used in that fashion? Asking brains need light bulbs.

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  4. Have a wonderful trip - and thanks for the laughs today!

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  5. Caro, so what's the take at CrimeFest on MP Sturgeon's choice of a red dress at her first meeting with PM Cameron, beyond it clashing with his maroon tie? I'm sure EvKa would be more interested in that than my proposed use for the deodorant stick that's caught his fancy.

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