Thursday, August 23, 2012

Einstein was wrong! (Or How to sell more books)


In my last blog, (http://murderiseverywhere.blogspot.com/2012/08/lawson-2.html) I wrote about the fascinating Alfred W. Lawson, professional baseball player, founder and editor of the first aviation magazines, designer of the first passenger aircraft and holder of the first US airmail contract.  I also discussed his answer to what he regarded as iniquity of bankers, who fleeced the public through charging interest on loans.  His answer was the Direct Credit Society, which advocated giving everyone some money to get started in life.
A modest man, Lawson claimed that his birth was “…the most momentous occurrence since the birth of mankind”.  He pooh-poohed most of previous science, including Einstein, and developed his own science called Lawsonomy.  His famous trilogy, Lawsonomy (1922), Mentality (1938), and The Almighty (1939) laid out the basis for his physical laws.  

Chapter 1 of Lawsonomy provides the background to Lawson’s thinking.  Here are some extracts:
Lawsonomy is based upon Life as it is and not upon a theory of what it ought to be.

Truth is simple and easily understood but falsity is complicated and misleading. A few words, sentences, paragraphs or pages are sufficient to tell the truth but it requires ponderous books and whole libraries to prop up falsity.

So if it isn't real; if it isn't truth; if it isn't knowledge; if it isn't intelligence; then it isn't Lawsonomy.

One must study and practice Lawsonomy and learn it as one learns to walk and run or talk and sing. It is a formula that proves all things. But, only as one cleanses the mind of all falsities and develops the reasoning faculties with Truth and practical thoughts can one utilize this far-reaching formula to advantage.

Although it is difficult to summarize his texts in this short space, it is correct to say that everything can be described in terms of the laws Penetrability, Suction and Pressure, and Zig-Zag-and-Swirl.
Penetrability:
In Lawson’s words:
So I say PENETRABILITY is the basic law of movement.

A piece of steel can penetrate water or air because it is of a different density but cannot penetrate another piece of steel of equal density.

When density is equal there can be no penetration.

Steel can penetrate heat and heat can penetrate steel because they are of different density.

I’m left speechless at the clarity of this concept.

Suction and Pressure:
Again in Lawson’s words:
Space made vacant by falling mass must be filled with substances of greater density, and this process is Suction.

When substances of greater density fall toward space of lesser density, the process is Pressure.

Suction and Pressure is the only force in Space. Each is dependent upon the other and nothing can move without their combined pull and push.

Suction is the female of movement and Pressure is the male of movement.

Needless to say, Lawson’s description of sex involved both the laws of Penetrability and Suction and Pressure.
Zig-zag-and-swirl:
Basically, Lawson proposed that everything in motion was acted upon by both suction and pressure that varied constantly.  This led to the object moving in an erratic zig-zag-and-swirl motion.
(I think this law could well be adopted by social scientists studying the behaviour of politicians.)

University of Lawsonomy
Lawson was so convinced of the correctness and power of his science that he started the University of Lawsonomy outside Des Moines in 1943, offering the degree of Knowledgian.  He also had the terrific notion (from which all of us who are writers could learn) that the only books students could read were books he wrote, which happened to be published by his publishing company, called the Humanity Publishing Company, owned by the Humanity Benefactor Foundation.  (There was a serious kerfuffle when the baseball team consulted an outside book about the rules of the game.  It is not clear from my reading whether the players and coach were expelled for this infraction.)
After a run-in with the IRS, the Institute of Lawsonomy reconstituted itself just outside Racine, Wisconsin, where, until recently, its huge billboard could easily be seen from I94.  A storm in 2009 left only the supporting posts standing, but in the distance a building was visible with “Study Natural Law” painted on its exterior.
Needless to say he also started the Religion of Lawsonomy, and there are still a few adherents.
When I look into the vastness of space and see the marvelous workings of its contents... I sometimes think I was born ten or twenty thousand years ahead of time.
Alfred Lawson
We need more people like Alfred William Lawson in our lives to enlighten us.
Stan - Thursday

7 comments:

  1. I'm tempted to toss out a one liner, Stan, but you're right, AWL is someone to regard seriously, if only for the prodigious nature and scope of his accomplishments. Can you imagine how successful he'd be in this marketing-mad information age?

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  2. I'm tempted to toss out something shamelessly flirtatious. But i give in instead to wondering about Lawson's students. Who were they, what was student life like, what happened to them after they graduated? Some must still be around. I would love to know what they now think. What a fascinating subject!

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  3. You toss, Annamaria, and I'm sure one of MIE's resident comics will take it from there...

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  4. I want a Knowledgian degree. I have several, but not this one, and it's obviously the only one worth having. But where's the accent? Is it KNOWledgian or KnowLEDGian? Surely we don't work all our lives to accumulate knowLEDGE. Or maybe we do and I've been doing it wrong all along, which would explain quite a lot.

    I LOVE people like Lawson. Thanks for this, Stan.

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  5. Maybe one should pronounce it the way Armenians do: KowledgIAN. I have long been a fan of AWL, as you may have guessed. I particularly like his depth and diversity of knowledge, his modesty, and his disdain of bankers.

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  6. We are currently doing a documentary on Alfred Lawson and Lawsonomy. Last Of The Lawsonomists follows Merle Hayden a 93 year old man who still studies and teaches those about Lawsonomy.
    Checkout our Kickstarter campaign. http://kck.st/11q15CO
    and our Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/Lawsonomy

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    Replies
    1. Thanks so much for posting here, Terry. I can't wait to see your documentary.

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